There Was an Old Farmer
Tune: There Was an Old Farmer

There was an old farmer who sat on a rock,
Shaking and waving his big hairy...
Fist at the ladies next door at the Ritz,
Who taught the young children to play with their...
Kite strings and marbles and all things galore,
Along came a lady who looked like a...
Decent young lady, but walked like a duck,
She thought she'd invented a new way to...
Bring up the children, to sew and to knit,
The boys in the stable were shoveling...
Litter and paper from yesterday's hunt,
And old farmer Potter was having some...
Cake in the stables and singing this song,
If you think that's dirty,
You're fucking well wrong!

Sweet violets, sweeter than the roses,
Covered all over from head to toe,
Covered all over in shit, shit, shit, shit!